Zeina Ashrawi Hutchinson's Letter

I wanted to share with you this letter written by the daughter of Hanan Ashrawi, a civil society leader and political activist here in Palestine.  The tragedy of it is that it is not an exceptional story.

Denied the Right to go Home

by Zeina Ashrawi Hutchinson

21 June 2008

I am Palestinian - born and raised - and my Palestinian roots go back centuries.  No one can change that even if they tell me that Jerusalem, my birth place, is not Palestine, even if they tell me that Palestine doesn't exist, even if they take away all my papers and deny me entry to my own home, even if they humiliate me and take away my rights.

I AM PALESTINIAN.

Name: Zeina Emile Sam'an Ashrawi; Date of Birth: July 30, 1981; Ethnicity: Arab.  This is what was written on my Jerusalem ID card.  An ID card to a Palestinian is much more than just a piece of paper; it is my only legal documented relationship to Palestine.  Born in Jerusalem, I was given a Jerusalem ID card (the blue ID), an Israeli Travel Document and a Jordanian Passport stamped Palestinian (I have no legal rights in Jordan).  I do not have an Israeli Passport, a Palestinian Passport or an American Passport.

Here is my story:

I came to the United States as a 17 year old to finish high school in Pennsylvania and went on to college and graduate school and subsequently got married and we are currently living in Northern Virginia.  I have gone home every year at least once to see my parents, my family and my friends and to renew my Travel Document as I was only able to extend its validity once a year from Washington DC.  My father and I would stand in line at the Israeli Ministry of Interior in Jerusalem, along with many other Palestinians, from 4:30 in the morning to try our luck at making it through the revolving metal doors of the Ministry before noon - when the Ministry closed its doors - to try and renew the Travel Document.  We did that year after year.  As a people living under and occupation, being faced with constant humiliation by an occupier was the norm but we did what we had to do to insure our identity was not stolen from us.

In August of 2007 I went to the Israeli Embassy in Washington DC to try and extend my travel document and get the usual "Returning Resident" VISA that the Israelis issue to Palestinians holding an Israeli Travel Document.  After watching a few Americans and others being told that their visas would be ready in a couple of weeks, my turn came.  I walked up to the bulletproof glass window shielding the lady working behind it and under a massive picture of the Dome of the Rock and the Walls of Jerusalem that hangs on the wall in the Israeli consulate, I handed her my papers through a little slot at the bottom of the window.

"Shalom" she said with a smile.  "Hi" I responded, apprehensive and scared.  As soon as she saw my Travel Document her demeanor immediately changed.  The smile was no longer there and there was very little small talk between us, as usual.  After sifting through the paperwork I gave her she said: "Where is your American Passport?"  I explained to her that I did not have one and that my only Travel Document is the one she has in her hands.  She was quiet for a few seconds and then said: "You don't have an American Passport?" suspicious that I was hiding information from her.  "No!" I said.  She was quiet for a little longer and then said: "Well, I am not sure we'll be able to extend your Travel Document."  I felt the blood rushing to my head as this is my only means to get home!  I asked her what she meant by that and she went on to tell me that since I had been living in the US and because I had a Green Card they would not extend my Travel Document.

After taking a deep breath to try and control my temper I explained to her that a Green Card is not a Passport and I cannot use it to travel outside the US.  My voice was shaky and I was getting more and more upset (and a mini shouting match ensued) so I asked her to explain to me what I needed to do.  She told me to leave my paperwork and we would see what happens.

A couple of weeks later I received a phone call from the lady telling me that she was able to extend my Travel Document but I would no longer be getting the "Returning Resident" VISA.  Instead, I was given a 3 month tourist VISA.  Initially I was happy to hear that the Travel Document was extended but then I realized that she said "tourist VISA".  Whey am I getting a tourist VISA to go home?  Not wanting to argue with her about the 3 month VISA at the time so as not to jeopardize the extension of my Travel Document, I simply put that bit of information on the back burner and went on to explain to her that I wasn't going home in the next 3 months. She instructed me to come back and apply for another VISA when I did intend on going.  She didn't add much and just told me that it was ready for pick-up.  So I went to the Embassy and got my Travel Document and the tourist VISA that was stamped in it.

My husband, my son and I were planning on going home to Palestine this summer.  So a month before we were set to Leave (July 8, 2008) I went to the Israeli Embassy in Washington DC, papers in hand, to ask for a VISA to go home.  I, again, stood in line and watched others get VISAs to go to my home.  When my turn came I walked up to the window; "Shalom" she said with a smile on her face, "Hi" I replied.  I slipped the paperwork in the little slot under the bulletproof glass and waited for the usual reaction.  I told her that I needed a returning resident VISA to go home.  She took the paperwork and I gave her a check for the amount she requested and left the Embassy without incident.

A few days ago I got a phone call from Dina at the Israeli Embassy telling me that she needed the expiration date of my Jordanian Passport and my Green Card.  I had given them all the paperwork they needed time and time again and I thought it was a good way on their part to waste time so that I didn't get my VISA in time. Regardless, I called over and over again only to get their voice mail.  I left a message with the information they needed but kept calling every 10 minutes hoping to speak to someone to make sure that they received the information in an effort to expedite the tedious process.  I finally got a hold of someone.  I told her that I wanted to make sure they received the information that I left on their voice mail and that I wanted to make sure that my paperwork was in order.  She said, after consulting with someone in the background (I assume it was Dina), that I needed to fax copies of both my Jordanian Passport and my Green Card and that giving them the information over the phone wasn't acceptable.  So I immediately made copies and faxed them to Dina.  A few hours later my cell phone rang.  "Zeina?" she said.  "Yes" I replied, knowing exactly who it was and immediately asked her if she received the fax I sent.  She said: "ehhh, I was not looking at your file when you called earlier but your VISA was denied and your ID and Travel Document are no longer valid."  "Excuse me?" I said in disbelief.  "Sorry, I cannot give you a visa and your ID and Travel Document are no longer valid.  This decision came from Israel, not from me."

I cannot describe the feeling I got in the pit of my stomach.  "Why?" I asked and Dina went on to tell me that it was because I had a Green Card.  I tried to reason with Dina and to explain to her that they could not do that as this was my only means of travel home and that I wanted to see my parents, but to no avail.  Dina held her ground and told me that I wouldn't be given the VISA and then said: "Let the Americans give you a Travel Document".  

I have always been a strong person and not one to show weakness but at that moment I lost all control and started crying while Dina was on the other end of the line holding my only legal documents linking me to my home.  I began to plead with her to try and get the VISA and not revoke my documents: "Put yourself in my shoes, what would you do?  You want to go see your family and someone is telling you that you can't!  What would you do?  Forget that you're Israeli and that I'm Palestinian and think about this for a minute!"  "Sorry" she said, "I know but I can't do anything, the decision came from Israel."  I tried to explain to her over and over again that I could not travel without my Travel Document and that they could not do that - knowing that they could, and they had!

This has been happening to many Palestinians who have a Jerusalem ID card.  The Israeli government has been practicing and perfecting the art of ethnic cleansing since 1948 right under the nose of the world and no one has the power or the guts to do anything about it.  Where else in the world does one have to beg to go to one's own home?  Where else in the world does one have to give up their identity for the sole reason of living somewhere else for a period of time?  Imagine if an American living in Spain for a few years wanted to go home only to be told by the American government that their American Passport was revoked and that they wouldn't be able to come back!

If I were a Jew living anywhere around the world and had no ties to the area and had never set foot there, I would have the right to go any time I wanted and get an Israeli Passport.  In fact, the Israelis encourage that.  I, however, am not Jewish but I was born and raised there, my parents, family and friends still live there and I cannot go back!  I am neither a criminal nor a threat to one of the most powerful countries in the world, yet I am alienated and expelled from my own home.

As it stands right now, I will be unable to go home - I am one of many.

Kristof's Trip to Hebron

NY times columnist in Palestine.  Even though I don't agree with all of the reasoning in this article, it is fantastic to see it in the American media.

No Discernible Line of Thought

I was reminded by a friend that I haven't posted anything in a while.  I guess I have just settled into a routine and gotten acclimated and started to feel too normal here.  I have been busy though so I'll share a bit of that with you.

I found an Arabic tutor.  Her name is Ranad and she is really great.  She was just starting university here when the second Intifada broke out.  It was impossible to attend school so she went to the Chicago and studied architecture.  She stayed for seven years and just returned last year.  Anyway, she is a great teacher and hopefully will be a great friend.  Saturday evening we went to a musical performance sponsored by the Edward Said National Conservatory of Music.  It is a beautiful, new, unique structure in the old city of Ramallah.  They added modern materials and shapes to the old stones of the city.  I don't usually like this combination of modern and ancient but I really loved this place.  The music was played on a roof that had large pieces of metal towering and bending above and around us to aid the acoustics.  The first to perform was a group of classical musicians from Spain, Italy, and France.  They were very enjoyable although I got a laugh out of their decision to play "What Would You Do With a Drunken Sailor" to a group of people living in a landlocked country that requires permits to leave, most of whom practice a religion that prohibits the consumption of alcohol.  The second group was a Palestinian group.  They are known for singing the songs of Sheikh Imam, an Egyptian singer and composer who was famous for his political songs against the ruling elite and in support of the common man.  Much of his music was written from Egyptian prisons where he spent time due to his criticism of the government.  His lyrics are still used today in anti-government street demonstrations in Egypt.  The message of his music resonates throughout the Arab world and is particularly meaningful to the Palestine question.  Here are some translated lyrics from a song he wrote about Palestine in 1974:

"O Palestinians, exile has lasted so long,

That the desert is moaning from the refugees and the victims,

And the land remains nostalgic for the peasants who watered it

Revolution is the goal, and victory shall be our first step"

The first few songs that they played contained very complex language but the later songs were much more accessible to the audience and everyone started joining in by clapping and singing along.  It was really a beautiful evening and had an effect on me for some reason. There were many children there and others could be heard playing in the street below us.  People were on the roofs of nearby buildings, watching and listening. As we arrived at the venue old men had been sitting in a circle outside carrying on some type of discussion. People so enjoyed their musical guests from Europe and really seemed to appreciate these small gestures of international recognition that Palestinians are so often denied.  The evening just felt like this big gift of beauty, happiness, peace, freedom.

I am also really enjoying the women that I work with.  A new woman just started last week.  She is from Gaza and her husband is a Fatah member.  When Hamas took over in Gaza he fled to the West Bank.  She followed him here seven months later.  We have all managed to find time during the day or over ice cream after work to discuss and share our lives as women.  Bikinis, marriage, the difficulties of being a working mother, domestic violence, what does "women's rights" mean?, remembering that we are all living within a culture that shapes us and our views on these things. These conversations have just reinforced for me how much women around the world share and that there is a tremendous amount of strength that we can gather from these shared experiences.  Of course in our conversations there are many things that we disagree about but we have so many issues to discuss because as women we face the same things even if we differ on how we choose to face them.

One more thing - a friend of mine who is in El Salvador this summer, another society that has recently lived through a traumatic conflict, was telling me about how he interacts with people who lost fathers or limbs, or eyeballs in a conflict with a government that is still in power.  He said that the current situation is not exactly Peace, but more like a "hangover".  So he was asking me, in light of a poll that he saw that showed 2/3 of Palestinians supporting "terrorist attacks" on Israel, if I thought that even if a political agreement was reached that removed the settlements, gave Palestinians free access to Jerusalem, set up a Palestinian state with the territorial integrity to flourish, etc., etc. would society still be suffering for generations from the hangover of this 60 years of conflict?  I don't know.  I think it would help that unlike El Salvador or South Africa for instance, that their former enemy would be in another state altogether.  The internal Palestinian fighting is very concerning though.  I think there would be such an exuberance in the air if (biggest IF you have ever seen) there is a just and comprehensive agreement that allows Palestinians to live freely within their land and control their own lives and futures (and too many other details to possibly list).  But, no, I don't think people are going to forget about their Nakhba (catastrophe) of 1948.  How could they?  It is a defining aspect of their history and identity.  No, they will not stop thinking about the land they used to own along the sea in what is now Tel Aviv or the farms they worked in the Galilee.  And they will never forget the indignities and oppression they continue to live with now.  (I'm sorry that these thoughts are so disjointed.  I wasn't planning on writing any of this.  I guess I'll just keep going with it though.)  Many Palestinians have told me that these experiences make them stronger.  They are proud that they continue to live.  They are proud to be the most highly educated society in the Arab world.  They are proud that they have not given up and that they continue to seek freedom and independence.  While dispossession and oppression is central to every negative aspect of life, it is also central to every positive aspect of life.  To marry, to laugh, to fly a kite all mean something different, something more when you are struggling for your ability to exist.

I guess one last thing that I will address here - the fact that 2/3 of Palestinians support "terrorist attacks" on Israel.  To me this has no meaning unless we understand who is doing the defining of "terrorist attacks".  Are they attacks on the Israeli security that is denying shipments of food and fuel into Gaza?  Are they rockets fired out of Gaza into the surrounding Israeli areas?  If it is these two acts then I would put the number of supporters or at least sympathizers at an even higher figure.  Here is why - to Palestinians these attacks are not terrorism. They are a response to a state military apparatus dropping bombs in their neighborhoods where children play and using their position of power to cut off the population of Gaza from the outside world, not to mention food, fuel, and medicine. Sure, maybe the Israeli army doesn't "target" civilians (usually) but they don't care to avoid them either.  Therefore Palestinian militant actions are not seen as acts of terrorism but as acts of war, self-defense, revenge, resistance.  I don't want to give the impression here that 2/3 of Palestinians are participating in violent methods of resistance.  I am just saying that there is no way they are going to label these actions terrorist and outright reject their use while the world continues to give Israel free reign to disregard the lives of Palestinian civilians, not to mention Lebanese!  What I would like to underscore, because I don't think we ever hear about it in the American media, is the strength of the non-violent movement here in Palestine. Nearly everyone participates in some way. Whether it is trying not to buy Israeli-made goods, joining your neighbors in flying kites out the window of your house after a curfew has been put into effect that denies you your right to leave your own home, or participating in one of the protests that occur throughout every week here.  This non-violent movement has somehow stayed alive throughout all these years. This is quite remarkable since besides the occasional favorable court ruling or the delay in Israel's theft of land because people have chained themselves to bulldozers, what has it accomplished?  The outside world is largely ignorant of this extremely active movement, the situation has deteriorated to a level of complete absurdity, and the international community has not yet been willing to join them on the large scales that brought down Apartheid in South Africa.  More thoughts on this later. 

Grandmothers' Stories

Today we had lunch with the Grandmother of the family I am living with.  She lives just below us.  After lunch she told me a part of her story.  Her and her husband had three children, all boys, together.  He was a doctor.  One of only two in their area.  During the periods of conflict, including the 1967 war, her husband was imprisoned several times by Israel.  The charge was that as one of only two doctors in their area that he was providing medical care to wounded soldiers.  Would we expect a doctor not to treat the wounded?  While he was in prison he was tortured with electric shock and burned with cigarettes.  Their oldest son died during one of these times of imprisonment and his wife had to bear this loss alone without her husband.  He was seven years old.  The husband died at the young age of 60 which, wrong or right, the grandmother blames on the stress of imprisonment and torture.

As she finished her story she tried to communicate to me that she accepts the way her life has unfolded but that doesn't diminish the pain it has been filled with, including the current pain at the situation in which her grandchildren are being raised and in which her old friends are coming to the end of their life, not in peace.

One interesting thing about this storytelling session was that when she first spoke she said, "The Jews came and arrested my husband."  Her son corrected her and said, "Mom, don't say Jew.  They are Israelis."  I have noticed this a lot in conversations with people.  The word Israeli is always used.  Not Jew.  Perhaps this is a generational change since the grandmother initially used a religious rather than national descriptor before her son corrected her.  I see this as a recognition that their struggle is against a state and religion is not an accurate or meaningful description of the system they are struggling against.  

In other news - I attended a screening of a new film produced by the Palestinian human rights organization - Al Haq.  You can watch the trailer here.  It tells one woman's story (and she was in the audience), of the ethnic cleansing of the three Latrun villages of Beit Nouba, Imwas, and Yalo in the West Bank.  This was carried out during the 1967 war.  It was quite a horrific story of forced migration.  The woman left her disabled mother behind in their house, expecting to return to her in a few days when the army let them back in.  After living in open fields for a few days with no food to feed their children, her and her husband returned to check on her mother and harvest some food from their fields.  They found her mother's body in a field, her husband was shot and killed in front of her for returning, and she was driven off the land by the Israeli army in a truck full of other women who had returned to their homes to gather more supplies.  The villages were then completely destroyed.  Every building.  And today an Israeli-only camp called "Canada Park" has been created with funds from the Canadian Jewish Community.  There has been an attempt to erase the history of the land.  Israeli school children who visit the park are told that the remnants of foundations of old churches, mosques, and homes are from some ancient village - not Palestinians.  The refugees from these three villages remain extremely active in protesting their expulsion from their land and their denial of return.  They are afraid that their land will be permanently ceded to Israel in the event of a political agreement between the Israeli and Palestinian governments.  The film also showed the work of Israeli organizations that are trying to educate Israeli youth about the truth of Canada Park.

Vacation on Segregation Sea

I don't mean to just keep posting articles.  But here is another example of how this occupation is being carried out.  The link is to a press release from ACRI (Association for Civil Rights in Israel) about the teaming up of the Israeli army and Israeli business owners on the Dead Sea to prevent the "mixing" of Palestinian and Israeli visitors to the popular weekend destination.  They expect to be able to explain away these types of bigoted policies with one word - security.

One Perspective

Very interesting blog posting by a Jewish American activist.

Occupied Time

This article was published on the BBC's website a few days ago.  It is written by an expat living in Ramallah and is a good description of the strangeness of life in this little bubble of freedom within the occupied West Bank.

Tonight we were on our way out for a walk in the city.  A few shops would be opening up although most remain closed all day on Friday.  On our way out we ran into some family guests that were on their way out from the grandmother's house that is below our house.  So we were all called back into the house for more visiting and eating.  The guests were the grandmother's sister, her son, and his family.  They came from Nablus.  The older women sat me down and said that they wanted me to know what has happened here and what their lives are like.  I spoke with the son's wife for quite some time.  She is a university professor in Nablus.  She wanted to know how the US can continue to let them live this way.  Her family is in Gaza and it is impossible for them to see each other now.  She was distraught and confused over Obama's comments about Jerusalem.

And then she started looking at her watch.  She explained that because her husband is a doctor he is able to get a permit to drive his car within the West Bank rather than take taxis everywhere.  But they have to go through the whole process of renewing this permit every 3 months.  And then she explained the clockwatching.  They are only allowed to be on the road with their car until 10pm.  They need to end their visits early enough so that they can make it through all of the checkpoints and get back to Nablus and off the roads before they turn into a pumpkin at 10pm.  She said, "you can see how it is always on top of us."

Obama in Palestine

People here have been avidly following the presidential primaries in the US and Obama made big news here after his speech on June 4th at the American Israel Public Affairs Committee (AIPAC).  In his speech he said "Jerusalem will remain the capital of Israel, and it must remain undivided."  The international community, including the US, does not recognize Jerusalem as the capital of Israel.  Embassies are in Tel Aviv.  The Bush administration response was that this is an incredibly sensitive issue that can only be decided through mutual agreement between Israelis and Palestinians.  Abu Mazan (President Abbas) also came out strongly against this statement by Obama.  

There was a feeling of resigned disappointment when I was discussing the elections with people today.  They thought that Obama would represent something new for America, and therefore for them.  Like me, they thought that he would take a more nuanced and honest approach to the conflict.  When I asked today whether people would prefer Obama or McCain the response was "neither".  I worry that people will look at the next 4-8 years of their and their children's lives as a continuation of the steadily deteriorating situation in which more and more land is lost and any glimmer of hope gets dimmer and dimmer.  I still plan to vote for Obama but he has been an immense disappointment for me since I fell in love with him in 2004.  I will likely never let myself love another politician again - but I guess this is probably a healthy thing.

Work is going well.  I really enjoy the women that I work with.  I visited the family of one of them tonight.  Visiting is way of life here.  It's nice.  Neighbors come by with their kids regularly for tea and chatting.  All generations together enjoying each other.  I had a great time.  The food was amazing and it just kept coming.  They have fruit trees and grape vines outside their house so the grape leaves for ورق دوالي  (stuffed grape leaves) and the fruit plate were very locally supplied.  The ride home was interesting as well.  A friend of my friend's brother drove us around the city for a while before bringing me home.  He was born in America but his Palestinian parents moved the family from Florida to Ramallah 12 years ago - not too long after the Oslo Accords.  The problem is that he has no Palestinian ID card.  He is just a Palestinian American with an expired visa.  Without the Palestinian ID he cannot pass through Israeli military checkpoints without risking being deported and separated from his family, unable to re-enter due to his Palestinianness.  With a checkpoint at both the north and south of Ramallah he is trapped here because he doesn't want to take the chance of being barred entry after he is deported for being caught without proper papers.  Because of this he has not been able to attend University.  It is just one more absurd life in this absurd situation.

Qalqilia

Today I officially began my internship with Filastiniyat.  They are a civil society organization that works on issues of youth, women, and free media.  The founder of this organization is an incredible woman.  She is active in media and political reform in Palestine and is involved in international and local women's movements.

We travelled to Qalqilia, a city further north in the West Bank to do a training with groups of youth from Jenin, Bethlehem, and Qalqilia.  With a Palestinian taxi we were riding on the shared roads.  There are other roads that only Israelis in the West Bank are allowed to use.  Driving through the West Bank you see settlements dotting the hill tops and reaching down the agricultural land on slopes of these hills.  The valleys are full of Palestinian villages.  You see Palestinians waiting for buses and across the street there are settlers waiting for buses.  You pass through checkpoints where Palestinian cars get stopped.  You see some cars with orange ribbons flying off of them.  These are the settlers who opposed the dismantling of settlements in Gaza and who oppose any effort to dismantle them in the West Bank.  The signs are in Hebrew, Arabic, and English.  People are so segregated and yet they are living amongst one another.  

Qalqilia is one of the cities that has been most impacted by the construction of walls and fences within the West Bank (rather than on the internationally recognized green line).  The economy of the city thrived on agricultural production and employment in Israel.  Now a fence has been constructed that completely encloses the city of over 50,000 people and it is extremely difficult for Palestinians to get permits to enter Israel.  There is only one way in and out of the city and it is through an Israeli army checkpoint.  This is one of the places in the West Bank where Israelis are not allowed to go.  On our way out the soldier asked us "Where are you going?"  It is just offensive.  Can you imagine that your city is surrounded like a prison and there are people with guns stopping you every time you use the one exit available to you?  And then to top it off he asks you where you are going!  This question is pointless.  Obviously you are going to one of the places that Palestinians are allowed to go to since you can't use the other roads and can't get through the checkpoints to places that are off limit.  Why do they ask this!?  Every time you want to leave your town you have to say "I am going to visit my mother-in-law in Ramallah" or "I am bringing my daughter to her university".  

The training with all of the young people was good.  As I have found in the last few days, people want to tell me their story.  They know that they are misrepresented in American media and that Americans are ignorant of the complexities of this conflict that are so openly discussed and debated within Israeli and Palestinian society.  For some reason these extremely important discussions are off limits in the American political dialogue which is terribly harmful considering the role that America plays in aid to both countries and in the peace process.  One man at the training, Osama, wakes up every morning and sees the fence which runs right by his house through what used to be his father's land.  He just received a degree in physical therapy after being held for two years in an Israeli detention center with no charges ever brought against him.  Seems to be a rite of passage with 40% of the Palestinian male population having been imprisoned.  His father is the only one in the family who has secured a work permit for Israel.  Osama keeps being rejected.

Other villages suffer a worse fate of not only being completely enclosed with only one exit but also having this gate open only from 6am until 8pm.  If you return home after 8 you are locked out of your village.  Even villages that aren't enclosed by a wall of fence face closing.  I witnessed one today on the ride back to Ramallah.  Tanks had pulled into the village entrances and blocked the ways in and out.

I knew about all of these things before I came here but they are almost unbelievable.  Seeing them with my own eyes has not lessened the disbelief.  I can't understand the motivation for this extensive system of oppression.  When will enough Israeli parents join those who are already raising their voices and demand that their children no longer be required to spend their days manning a system of oppression?

On a personal note - I am doing well.  It is a difficult city to get your bearings in and I am notorious for not even having bearings.  But I am figuring out my way around bit by bit.  The family I am staying with is great and I have a lot of fun with their kids.  It seems like this whole blog nonsense is coming off a lot more like my thoughts than actually sharing my travels.  I guess email is still best for really keeping in touch (especially since this is so one way!).  So all of you - send me an email and keep me updated on your summers!